(805) 319-6697

ms@drmarjorieschuman.com

Santa Barbara

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Rupture and Repair in Intimate Relationships

It always takes two to tango

Most emotional problems that erupt in intimate relationships stem from wounds that were incurred with parents and siblings in the formative years of childhood.  The tension between the desire for, and fear of, intimate connection can twist couples into painful knots. In order to untangle emotionally charged issues, it is necessary for each person to see how each their patterns of attachment are challenged by the partner’s. 

By gaining some perspective on the reactive patterns that get reciprocally triggered in one another, it becomes possible for the couple to come to an empathic understanding that is inclusive of the pain of both.  In this way, relationship problems can actually become an opportunity to develop a deeper intimacy based in mutual empathy, respect and compassion.

 

mandala

Partnering For Change

Therapy By and For Couples

My husband and I work in tandem with some of our couple clients, meeting with the two individuals separately, as well as with the couple conjointly to address relationship issues.

This four-way exchange makes it possible to explore the conflicts in the relationship and how best to resolve them.

This arrangement works well not only for spousal partners, but also for parents and children, siblings, and other pair bonds.

As a couple, my husband and I bring our own relationship into the work on many different levels simultaneously.    As we work together, we are able to illuminate both male and female perspectives.   And,  we are able to model how to communicate effectively and negotiate conflict.

Working with us as your ‘partners in change,’ you and your loved one will develop insight into your particular dynamics.

With this new empathetic perspective on your difficulties, it becomes possible to dissolve the barrier which stand in the way of deeper love and intimacy between you.